Tuesday, November 22, 2011

My problem with "Biblical Womanhood"

Yup, you read it right. So since I took my little "blog-break" I, of course, had to battle out some things with Satan. Through lots of scripture, conviction, and prayer I have received deep convictions about legalism and being very cautious about what I believe when I read my "Christian" blogs and what I need to let God's Word filter. 

One being this popular and trendy thing in the religious world called the "Quivering" movement. It is an idolization of this era, that was no where near ancient times. Right after I got baptized, Satan knew my sin and knew that I really like black and white and when things are gray I struggle with finding the truth and so I go to people instead of God.

I came across a blog-a-sphere of women who were so sure on the calling that Christ had called them to and that every women's calling is the same; being a house-wife, wearing long skirts, homeschooling, and having large families.

Let me start off by saying none of these things are bad or sinful. None of these things are in or not in the Bible however there is something very scary about this idolatry of Biblical Womanhood.

Idolization of Self.

Without realizing women have been sucked into this idea of a self improvement. Making laundry lists of things they are going to do to "become a better Christian". They have turned Christianity into a checklist (Sounds familiar... Pharisees) They have put the focus so much focus on self and self improvement and have become so inwardly focused that they are missing the Big Picture. Christ.

What does Biblical Womanhood look like? Is it slaving all day in the kitchen (Jesus rewards Mary for choosing the better when Martha was slaving away), is it keeping your kids home schooled so they aren't around the "sinful" kids? (Jesus said He came for the lost, and hung around with the dirtiest of dirty people, don't think this doesn't apply to us), is it making sure you dress your best everyday to look more feminine (again... focusing on the flesh way too much and loosing focus on God)? Well the answer to all those questions is "No".

You wanna know what real Biblical Womanhood looks like?...

Look at Christ.

The fact of the matter is is that if one were to study the Bible and look at Jesus life they would see that it is anything but "self improvement" even though He was perfect and He didn't need to however He left the example for us. Jesus did not come to die a gruesome death to give us religion. He came so we could be reconciled with God and have a real relationship with Him... Let me repeat that...

To have a RELATIONSHIP with Him. 

The problem with this whole idolatry of "Biblical Womanhood" is that it is a set of rules, whether known or not, made by man. That seem righteous but can have the wrong motives. (I do believe there are separate roles for man and woman and woman should submit to their husbands)

"See to it that no one takes you captive through the philosophy, and empty deception according to the tradition of men, according to the elementary principles of the world, rather than according to Christ." - Colossians 2:8 

The quivering movement is a "Self Help" into heaven and unfortunately (this may be bold) but many will be surprised on the day of judgement that their clean homes, kept laundry, long skirts, and home schooled children did not earn them their salvation. As much as we all like to think were "good people" we are nothing, not even good, without Jesus and what He did on Calvary. Nothing can earn salvation. Salvation is clear in the Bible and no it is not by works however it is not by "just believing" or "praying Jesus into your heart". These are not Biblical.

Faith without works is dead. Yes, this is true. But relying on ones on righteousness and not that of Christ (I mean... He meant what He said when He died and said"It is finished") is not that of The Gospel. Or else we should just rely on self help books instead of The Bible.

The second commandment is clear about putting others before ourselves, not our self improvement before we serve others.

To make sure I don't get caught up in self improvement (repentance is good however self improvement will fail if Christ isn't doing the work) I make sure I am serving others before I'm worried about my outfit that day, what chores I need to do, etc. 

It is time to stop quivering and time to wake up. There are children who are dying of hunger and we are worried about checking everything off our "To Do" list. There is famine and natural disasters, and we are worried about whether or not we look "feminine" in our skirt today. There are women who are prostituting themselves to survive and put food on the table for them and their child and yet we are worried about learning better homemaking skills. If I'm supposed to love others as myself, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want to be prostitute, be starving, or live in an after math of a hurricane or earthquake. It's that simple.

That is Biblical Womanhood my friends. I have prayed and searched out many scriptures about this topic and the more I pray and search, the deeper my conviction is to stay away from blogs that preach this and not how I can bring others to Christ, because my clean laundry and home schooled child definitely won't save souls, which has been what we were called to do oh so long ago "Go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them and teaching them to obey"

This is Paul talking about about people believing they needed to fulfill the law again because they wanted to please the people who said that this was necessary. 

"Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ" -Galatians 1:10

Are we living as if Christ died for nothing??

"I do no set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing"- Galatians 2:21

"Those people are zealous to win you over, but for no good. What they want is to alienate you from us, so that you may have zeal for them." -Galatians 4:17

Are we putting out good works before the importance of our growth in spirit and faith? Good works will surely arise from that if we grow in the fruits of the spirit anyways.

"For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision nor uncircumcision has any value. The only thing that counts is fiath expressing itself through love." -Galatians 5:6

"Neither circumcision nor uncircumcision means anything; what counts is the new creations" -Galatians 6:15

I want my readers to know that I think being a wife and a mother are such special roles that God gives us. I think a big part of our ministry is at home whenever we have our families. I don't want anyone to think I am bitter to the "housewife" role or "submission" this is definitely not the case. The reason I did this post is because I was very convicted about the mass amount of Christian blogs that completely have forgotten the big picture... The Cross.. and have made Christianity for women to be about how they can be the best June Cleaver. But the thing is God never called us to be like June Cleaver, He called us to be like His Son.

A song for those women chasing after true Biblical Womahood


  1. Dang Stephanie, you always convict me with your blog post. I love the updated look and I love that you are sharing all that you have been learning in your search to find out who you are to be as a woman disciple of Christ. -Stephanie

  2. I understand where you're coming from and it looks like we will have to agree to disagree. I will however urge you to be careful not to judge my motives for making certain decisions for my family and assuming I am in some way trying to earn my salvation. I'm sure there are some individuals who are banking on their works to earn them access to heaven. But I am not one of them. I love my Lord (whom I have an amazing relationship with) and simply seek to obey His every calling on my life.

  3. Good post..I have become grieved over those who are so wrapped up in homemaking and raising their godly families that they forgot about outward ministry. Most parents of special needs can testify to being excluded at church and homeschool groups. You can shelter your kids too much and family can become an idol.

  4. "Are we living as if Christ died for nothing??" Exactly.

  5. Thanks for this post. I was really heavily involved with some of the Biblical Womanhood blogs and groups a couple years ago, and I found it really hurt my walk with God because I was spending more time trying to be a 50s style homemaker instead of loving and serving others and reading what the Bible says to all Christians, not just a few handpicked verses directed to women.

    I also think that mindset often pushes a type of idolatry where the husband and family become exalted above God, and there is a dangerous trend out there of telling women it's OK to sin if it pleases their husbands, and that they can ignore other scriptures so long as they fulfill a certain role that has been developed for women.

  6. Hi, great blog!
    I want to be like Jesus...not like June Cleaver.
    I also have been called to work, in addition to being a mom and wife. Yes, I am still a homemaker..a home is made through Christian love and service, not by a checklist of who does the laundry or whether I pay someone to put dishes in my dishwasher or if I do it myself. My daughter is very happy and asks me to read the Bible with her every night (something I've done since she was a baby.) I also am happier and more emotionally and spiritually healthy as I follow the career path God called me to follow.
    I see nothing wrong with staying home with the kids, if God has called a woman (or a man) to that role. God can empower us to serve Christ wherever He places us...and it is His choice for each individual believer if we hold careers or not.
    I want to be more like Jesus and I want to be the sort of priest/believer/woman that everyone can see Jesus in.

  7. True, a personal relationship with Christ is our highest priority to Christ, ourselves and to present to our families, neighbors, etc. One can not say, however, something against those who choose to teach their children at home just as one can not say something against those who choose to place their children in public or private schools. Only God can judge his servants and their hearts' intents, on whether they be wicked, vain or insincere.